Now a lot of you my not know but I suffer with my mental health, its been awful at times but getting now, its strange because it can strike at anytime, when your not even thinking about it. I became low, low in confidence, low in mood and to be honest I felt I was useless and letting people down. Which I know its a load of BS, but at the time for me I was battling, battling with myself which is a worse and hardest battle of them all. I have had to face it on my own for a little while, but not anymore I have been getting help and counselling as well, work have been brilliant. This really started last year and they said you will have blips, I had a blip this year with everything going on in the world, it is crazy and I didn’t know what to do, but again progress to start and build myself up again. I can finally say I am feeling more myself and more confident, than I have ever before. You learn from these battles.
Now gaming is a huge part of my life always will be and I know people say all about the negative effects of it on your life an health, but my councillor said to me focus on you and what you love doing and that is gaming. I love gaming, and I found my escape in gaming it made me forget some my troubles not all ,but it allowed my mind to think of other things, allowed my imagination to run wild again, as I am creative as well. Gaming really helped me, its like reading, like an interactive book. Games like Spyro and CTR really helped to be honest, and I am gonna say RE3 remake as well it was great and I would set my little goals of what i wanted to get to out of the games, such do I do trophies run and ta dah RE3 platinum in the bag. Games give me focus and make things a little easier for me and make re think why I was upset in the first place, plus having a little plan for RE3 runs of the games really helped.
Not just playing games though helped, but the gaming community itself they have been really supportive on twitter, in the games themselves its been great and hearing others suffering the same, we could talk about these things and talk about games, obviously talk about problems, but talk about something than just our problems, talk about the hobby and the games we love , cheering each other on when we were doing well in games and getting those trophies. Keeping our spirits up together.
I am not gaming is the cure, it is just what works for me, I didn’t just do gaming I read a lot more the Kindle paperwhite has been my ulimate buy for 2020, but talking to people not just professionals, but talking to family and friends open up to them tell them how your feeling. I have realised its okay not to be okay. Just talk, open up which I know is hard, but first step is always the hardest and it will be hardest thing you ever do but you will feel so much better.
I know its something I don’t normally post I just wanted to share my story and to let people know that they aren’t on their own. Which leads me on to I am going to be doing a Charity stream for a mental health charity called Mind and all the donations will be going to them, next week I will set up an event so you can all catch me playing something badly. I wanted to give back to people that helped me.